Things You Learn in College, but Not in Class

Except I edited it, because not everything is applicable...

• Quarters are like gold. Flip-flops become as important as soap, and shampoo.
• Asleep by 2:30 AM is an early night.
• New additions to the food groups: Coffee, chips, soft serve, and oreos.
• Make sure your alarm clock has back-up batteries.
• Duct tape heals all wounds.
• Showers become less important.
• Sleep becomes more important.
• 10 minutes is more than enough time to get ready for your first class.
• Going to the mailbox was never an ego-booster (or ego-breaker) before.
• You begin to nap again.
• The book your professor wrote is always required for his class.
• E-mail becomes your second language.
• Lacrosse parties are exactly like they are in the movies.
• Ten-page papers used to sound impossible, now they’re a Godsend.
• You never realized so many people are smarter than you.
• You never realized so many people are dumber than you.
• Bum rides, money, notes and snacks as much as you can get them.
• Plain pasta never constituted a complete meal before.
• Forget putting the toilet seat down, you just pray that they flush.
• Frisbee becomes a contact sport.
• Care packages rank up there with birthdays.
• Pop a vitamin and breakfast is covered.
• Learn to love your roommate, especially when he leaves you the room.
• You always thought that worshipping the porcelain god was just an expression, but it’s not.
• Printers only break down when you desperately need them.
• Even though the beds are long, they are also extra narrow.
• Things that were a huge deal in high school are now commonplace.
• You never thought you would share so much about yourself with people you have known for such a short time
• Any game can be made into a drinking game.
• Disney movies are more than just classics.
• Find one thing you like in the dining hall and go with it.
• You will hear more stupid nicknames than you ever thought possible.
• Phone calls almost never happen and when they do, you just don’t get the messages.
• Cereal makes a meal any time of day.
• Keep your high school term papers; nowadays, everything is recycled.
• ATMs are the devil’s advocate.
• Beware the boy in the Care Bear toga.
• You almost forget how to drive.
• You’ll drink anything if it’s free.
• You get really good with excuses for skipping class.
• The girl you’re going to marry may live right next door, so keep your stereo down.
• Ordering food at 1 AM is a common occurrence.
• You never realized how cool you can be.
• TV becomes a bigger time sucker than ever before.
• You realize how great your hell summer job was once you have to study.
• Keys have never been so important, yet you seem to lose them more than ever before.
• You learn to sleep with light, noise, extreme temperatures, and roommates snoring.
• You don’t have to cover your textbooks anymore.
• You become a juggler with the balance between school, friends, girls/boys, activities, work, parties.
• You live for chicken finger day at the cafeteria.
• People that were geeks in high school seem okay now.
• You begin to realize that college is about the ideal lifestyle, except for those pesky classes.
• You get good at rationalizing on whether to do homework or not.
• Procrastination becomes an art.
• Jeans may be worn as many times as the wearer desires.
• The only reason you ever dress up is when everything else is dirty.
• With all the wealth of knowledge around you, you start to feel like you’re on intellectual welfare.
• Going to the mini-mart is a major treat.
• Amount of alcohol consumed is inversely proportional to grade point average.
• You have two kinds of shoes: everyday shoes and party shoes.
• Classes: the later the better.
• The cute people actually talk to you now.
• Care packages make it all worthwhile.
• The longer you’re there, the less you talk about home.
• Always wear your safety goggles. They’re not kidding.
• You don’t learn last names.
• Card games never lasted for hours before.
• Vacuuming happens every semester, if you get around to it.
• Boys will dance in college.
• People who never talked to you in high school are now your best friends when you come home.
• You are NEVER alone.
• It’s amazing how late you can stay up doing absolutely nothing, yet falling asleep in class or in the library takes an average of two seconds.
• You spend a ridiculous amount of time pondering the mystery of whether the Lucky Charms in the cafeteria are the real thing. (They're not.)
• People magazine is your deep philosophical reading material.
• All you have to do to make new friends is have mom send some cookies.
• You never realized how quiet your house was.
• Dishes aren’t dirty enough to wash until they have bugs and / or mold in them.
• You get along so much better with your family now that you never see any of them.
• Your life will never be the same again.

-http://thecareercloset.com/2009/11/21/things-you-learn-in-college/